10 Eye-Opening Lessons I've Learned at 30

“For the first 30 years of your life, you make your habits. For the next 30 years of your life, your habits make you.” – Hindu Proverb

Thirty must be really a significant age. Medically speaking, our brain only gets fully matured and developed when we reach the age of 30. In the Bible, the number 30 can symbolize dedication to a particular task or calling.

As I celebrate my 30th birthday this week, I can’t help but to be emotional and feel grateful for all the life experiences. And before I look ahead into the next decade of my life, I’d like to share to all of you the lessons I have learned in this beautiful, challenging and adventurous journey called life:

1. Learn to deal with people as they are.

I grew up living with the Universal Golden Rule, “Do not do unto others what you don’t want others to do unto you”. So, I’ve always tried my best to treat people fairly and nicely. However, I’ve experienced meeting, working and dealing with rude and mean people. And no matter how I had tried to keep being nice despite their character, they won't change because of your good treatment. People are just the way they are. Good or mean, deal with them as they are.

2. Discover and know what you want.

It’s tough to live a life when you don’t know exactly what you really want and who you are. I was once the person who didn’t know why I was here. It was one of the most challenging periods of my life where I felt like a physical, fiddling body thriving in the world, with a soul dying inside. And because I questioned my existence, I got my answer. When I got my answer, I’ve learned more about my potential and the following actions seemed to be more meaningful.

3. Fear is what you made on your mind.

It doesn't really exist in reality, but it does on your mind. When you allow the fear to live and reside in your mind, it becomes your own belief, and eventually your circumstances. Thoughts of fear crystallize into weak habits, which results in dependence and loss of control. Always cultivate good, pure and positive thoughts.

4. Successful means being happy.

The happiness you feel from material goods is ephemeral. It doesn't last long and the sooner you know, you lose the object of your happiness by wanting another thing. It's a vicious cycle. At some point in my life, I asked myself, "Am I successful?" and my answer was No. That was the time I realized that success is not based on the amount that you have on your bank account and all the other things it can buy.

5. Work hard onto something that you love.

Your job occupies most of your time, and will continue for long until retirement. It’s essential that you are enjoying and loving your work. If not, you will lose the interest, energy and will eventually be burned out. Find a job that inspires you and makes your heart beat every single day.

6. Respect and love your parents.

I have always wanted to leave home and be independent. The first six months I have lived abroad, away from my parents, hit me right into my heart how I didn't value them well when I was living with them. For some reasons, I had a flashback of the times I talked back to my parents when they had scolded me. I could still vividly remember that day, and as tears raced down my cheeks, I sent a long message to my parents telling them how deeply sorry I was on my younger, defiant, rebellious days.

7. Own your life.

A marred life cannot be blamed to other people. You are responsible for all the results from your life experiences. You may not be able to control all the circumstances that come into your life path but you are responsible for your own actions and reactions. In the end, it is you, who created your life.

8. Love is not enough.

I spoke with friend of mine and told her, "Love is not enough”. She answered, "Yes Cherie, love is not enough. You are lucky that you're learning this lesson at your age.” I was stunned by her response. All my life, I thought love was enough. Love could move mountains. Love could conquer it all. I researched about relationships and the reasons behind separations. It takes a whole lot of factors to maintaining and keeping a relationship.

9. Get out of your comfort zone.

Study abroad, travel, or migrate. Take risks, forget about your fears and believe in yourself. Make friends, learn other peoples' culture, surround yourself with people who will encourage and lift you up. Be curious, study something different *of your interest, and never stop improving yourself. It will change your perspectives and widen your horizon.

10. Wisdom comes with life experiences, not with age.

So go ahead and make mistakes as you can, learn, be better, and do things all over again. When history repeats or the same experience happens, you will know how to deal with it much way better than before.

Always stay true to yourself, live a purposeful life, keep positive thoughts and the happiness will radiate your entire being and will affect people around you.

#lessons #life #birthday #thirty